But I can't see you or know what's going on. Then I hear the others come in. I'm excited and nervous because we haven't shared before. So none of you ...ay anything to me. So I say sir what is going on. You tell me to hush that we are going to play a game. The rules are simple. I am to be quiet unless you have asked me a question. If I make noise you will issue one lash of a riding crop. I'm only to answer to you. And I'm not allowed to come without your permission. You tell me that you and your. I'dwatch people, mostly of my own age, but also good looking men older than me.I started to realise that my tendencies weren't towards men but towardswomen and I started to pay particular attention at places like schoolshowers and at the pool and pool showers. Gradually my fantasies turnedcompletely towards women - some my age, some mum's age. This went on untilI was about 12 and a half. That's when I had my first girl/girl encounter.It happened at school one day after the last class, Physical. It was spring so they must be full time residents but, summerfolk just the same.It takes a long time and a few winters to become 'local'. Some folks never get there.To a man, the locals were dressed in khaki pants, with pressed creases so sharp you could cut slices in the newspapers they were all reading. Starched button-down off white shirts with breast pocket protectors filled with ink pens, sharpened number 2 pencils and a slide rule.They all wore deck-shoes, and that felt odd to me; 55. It was just a dream.”“It’s not a dream, is it, Em. I died.” Her eyes flashed open and stared at me.“Don’t go there, Jacob. Please don’t go there. I can’t stand it. It was just a dream and I’ll never let you go.” Tears sparkled in her eyes and I wrapped my arm around her to hold her against me.“I thought you let go last night,” I whispered.“Tony?”“Yeah.”“You felt abandoned?”“Yeah.”“Like Francie?”“Em...”“Jacob, I didn’t fuck Tony to get back at you.” She rolled farther toward me and kissed me.
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