"I'm really glad you're here too!" You mean to say nobody else, in all of human history, has ever been damned to Hell before?" Uhhhhh..." Satan looked...at me very apologetically, "No. I mean ... Yeah. That about sums it up." But what did I do? I mean, I killed myself, so what? Zillions of folks do that all the time! I lied, I cheated at Monopoly, I fucked every chance I got, drank, did drugs, shoplifted, kicked a dog, strangled a cat almost to death once, ummm ... I swear a lot, I eat meat on. “Well, not really. Since they both did drug interdiction over in Somalia, they were the perfect candidates for us to recruit,” she tells me.“Um, how much are you paying them?” I ask expecting a poor pay scale.“Well, we are paying them by the event,” she tells me.“What does that me, by the event?” I ask.“It means that when the team has interaction with the drug cartel people, they get paid for that amount of time only,” she tells me.“Special Agent Wade, we need to change that way of paying these. He grinned up at me. ‘Didn’t want to get you pregnant your first time. That’s a bad first impression to have of such an…intimate act.’ I looked at him suspiciously. ‘How did you know I was a virgin?’ ‘Well, first of all, you told me, but I watched your reactions to make sure you weren’t lying. You responded to everything with wide eyes and you were shaking a bit. That’s how I knew.’ ‘But why is it so important that I am a virgin?’ He smiled, devilishly. ‘I want to be the man who first. There would be no concealing the changes. Not that thisplan hadn't already failed with George telling the press and the nosyneighbours around everywhere. The girl had probably already been noticed."You look so...different," she finished lamely. "But do come in now,honey... and you too, doctor Woodman. Thank you so much for helping usduring all this!"They sat down by the kitchen table, and Woodman started presentingmultiple release forms, pill bottles, documents and other such nonsense.During.
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