I was about to leave for my room, but she asked me to stay. She looked very sad when I said I was leaving. Then I said ok. But I will go change and co...e back. She agreed.I went and came back in 10 minutes. She had cleared up the food plates and she was ready to sleep. I was going for the second single bed and she said we can share the double bed. I was like, no it’s not appropriate. She was like no its alright. We are friends.Then we retired to bed. I switched off the lights. And she talked. “Come here and buckle these restraints,” she ordered.As I approached, I could see there were leather bindings, closed by small silver buckles. One for each wrist and another pair for her ankles. Gently I did them up as Nat checked that they were secure.“Now fuck me,” she insisted, turning to look me in the face, “I want you to fuck me hard, pull my hair, spank me, talk dirty — do whatever you want.”Taking my cock in my hand, I guided it to her dripping cunt and edged inside. Carefully I began. Could we…uh…look…I want to start all over. Can we do that?’ ‘Start over? Like how? I’m not sure what you mean John.’ ‘How about a date?’ ‘A date?’ ‘Yeah. How about for tomorrow night around seven?’ ‘Uh…yeah. Sure. I mean…I’d love to. Seven it is.’ ‘Great. I’ll pick you up at your place then. Uh…dress up just a tad bit. We’re going to the Laredo.’ I was stunned. The Laredo was the first place we had gone to as a married couple. It was there that we had talked about our future together. It was. I do have opinions and beliefs as to those behaviors that are better suited to noble and heroic labels – compassion, integrity, self deprecation, and so forth – and I have, in fact, come to believe that I have made great strides in this regard – but I cannot get past the feeling that those strides are, of necessity, merely vanity. I know that I think of myself as heroic, that my behavior has become, in my opinion, both selfless and compassionate. But that, it seems to me, is as much the luck of.
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