“Just a guy who lives here,” I dutifully replied.“He’s super cool, mom,” said my little man-child, who then, not-so-tactfully said, “You s...ould date him.”“Kev!” I exclaimed in horror, “Since when do you take an interest in my personal life?”“Since I saw how he looked at you,” Kevin shot back.“And pray tell me,” I asked, “How did he look at me?”“With his eyes,” Kevin shot back.“Well,” I replied, “I am so thankful it was with his eyes and not with anything else!”“Mom!” Kevin pressed, “He looked. “I just want to fuck.”Han was flabbergasted. His world turned inside out. The outlaw pilot who’d been in a thousand scraps and visited every strange corner of the galaxy; who thought he’d seen it all, was speechless. Han felt like he’d just been punched. Then the real blow came.SMACKHer open palm streaked across his face, bitch slapping him with a force he could scarcely believe. It nearly knocked him over.“ON YOUR KNEES! And open that mouth! If we don’t get started, they’ll chop you up and. She was a mess and I felt a touch of remorse for my curt response. “Look,” I said finally; “I was out of line back there, and apologize.” Her sobbing diminished and she dropped her hands only to stare at her lap. “You look like you’ve been through a pretty rough time; why don’t you let me treat you to a burger or something . . .?” A slight smile briefly crossed her face, and we made eye contact for the first time. She had a lovely face with large soulful brown eyes, an upturned ‘pixie’ nose. Watching him pick his nose and fart his way along. He was definitely heading towards Little Russia. 'Maybe this thing will be over soon,' I thought, 'and I can be a hero for Mrs Delaney. Perhaps then she will let me do despicable things to her anus'. He parked up alongside the curb and cumbersomely hauled his chubby ass out of the car. I watched him cross the street and enter a bar. I gave him five minutes. I used the time to entertain myself with thoughts of the divine Mrs Delaney and her.
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